The search for Happiness

All of us talk about finding happiness. But really, finding happiness is something that we all do, though often with little success. In fact, I would say that people today have a lot of practice in the search for happiness. It's just that they look for that happiness in all the wrong places.

Any of these sound familiar?

Over eating

"Shopping" therapy

Using drugs or alcohol

Affairs

Staying in unhealthy relationships

Procrastination

Partying

Looking for online friends

These are ways we try to find happiness but sadly we are extremely unsuccessful. In fact, these attempts at happiness often lead to more discontent.

Happiness is a skill

What most people do not realize is that happiness is a skill- just like playing a sport or music instrument. If you learn the more effective ways to play AND you practice, you can get good at any skill. Unfortunately most people have not learned the skills of what truly brings more happiness, so they are practicing unhelpful and sometimes detrimental practices in their pursuit of happiness.

To be happy, just be GREAT

Regardless of what is going on in your life, you can make it better, and it won't cost you a thing. All you have to do is be GREAT!

G = Gratitude

R = Relaxation

E = Exercise

A = Assist others

T = Talk it out

Gratitude: Be grateful for what you have rather than discontent about what you don't

We have a tendency to scan our environment and focus on what's bad, what "should" be better, and what needs to be "fixed." Instead focus on the positive elements in your life- be thankful for what you have.

Relaxation: Decrease stress and relaaaax

Relaxing doesn't require you to sit in an uncomfortable, cross-legged position and repeatedly chant "om," either. True relaxation, in which you flush the stress out of your body and mind, is just a simple way of being happier.

Exercise: Exercise your way to happiness

We are all familiar with at least some of the benefits of exercise to our physical health but did you know, though, that exercise is also good for your psychological health? Evidence shows that exercise can raise mood-enhancing neurotransmitters in the brain, enhances positive attitudes, releases muscle tension, promotes better sleep, has a calming effect and lessens anxiety and depression.

So get moving, and make it fun - go for a walk with your dog, bounce on a trampoline, go dancing, or play with your kids.

Assist others: Helping out others will increase your own happiness

When you help someone, you not only help the individual receiving the aid, but also yourself. Performing kind acts for others is one of the most satisfying and gratifying things you can do with your time. It helps alter your focus from "what is wrong with my life" to more positive thoughts like "I don't have it as bad as she does" and "I am really making a difference." Look for opportunities throughout the day to help others. You, and the person receiving your assistance, will appreciate that you did.

Talk it out: Use effective communication

George Bernard Shaw said that the "The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place." Arguments, conflicts and even wars have been waged because of problems with effective communication. Learn to really listen to others and then verify if what you heard is really what they meant. When you do, what a happy world it will be!

Its the parents who ingrain in the child the values of living - I would like to share a Dad's letter to his child, which so beautifully gives a positive perspective towards life.

Do not bear grudge towards those who are not good to you. No one has the responsibility to treat you well, except your mother and I.

To those who are good to you, you have to treasure it and be thankful, and also you have to be cautious , because, everyone has a motive for every move. When a person is good to you, it does not mean he really likes you. You have to be careful, don't hastily regard him as a real friend.

Its so amazing how we as individuals, parents and teachers put a tab on our own and our children's and pupils's abilities and potentials, and also how what we believe to be true for us and for our dependents- actually defines how we perform.

We almost always tend to protect ourselves and our loved ones from going that 'extra mile' on the pretext of lack of physical and/or emotional strength- little do we realize that we all have in us the ability to surpass what we think we are capable of.

Our children need just that extra trust- our trust that they can do it.